This isn’t really a goodbye, because I still have a book to publish, and I still have a tiny bit of marketing to do (along with some cool surprises in the near future!). But I need to let everyone know that I am pulling way, way, way back.
Most would say quitting a writing career after only two books is cutting things off way too quickly. But the truth is, it’s long overdue.
I only wrote a book to see if I could. That may sound arrogant, but those who know me know that’s just how I roll (this flaw is the same reason I have a flight instructor certificate instead of just a private pilot one). It was a challenge, one I wasn’t sure I could do. So I tried. I wrote a book. And then another. Asrian Skies even sold to people who don’t know me. It made money. In less than six months, I’ve almost made up the productions costs. Cool, huh?
It’s been less than two years since I began Asrian Skies, and I’m already tired of fighting. I’m tired of people criticizing my writing process, my book, and my characters. I’m tired of the stigma of indie authors, even after doing everything possible to put out a professional book. I’m tired of still being on the fringe of the writing community, of never being truly accepted (for reasons I can only speculate about). I’m tired of people questioning my motivations and integrity. I’m tired of the one-star reviews, the trolls, and the cliques.
Basically, I’m tired of being told you’re doing it wrong.
See, it’s really, really hard to see your process criticized in blog entries and published books. It’s hard to see your writing ignored because it’s the wrong genre—especially when you wrote the book you did because you couldn’t find anything you truly enjoyed reading. It’s hard to be looked down on because you’re a hobby writer and that’s all you’ll ever be. It’s even hard to explain how pervasive these subtle criticisms are, but they’re there, and taken together, they’re impossible to deal with right now.
If I sound bitter, I’m really not. I’m sad about the state of the publishing industry, and I’m disappointed that writing can’t exist in a bubble. I’m discouraged that writing is one more thing that’s about how well you relate to people more than how well you can do it. That’s not something I’ve ever had the skill at. I could work at it a thousand years, and it’s not something I’ll ever have the skill at. It’s just not my personality.
Am I done writing? No. Probably not. Unbroken Fire
is at the editor, and it’ll need some work before it’s ready to publish UPDATE! was just released. I’ll continue to peck away at the next book, and maybe even the fourth if inspiration hits. I’ll keep beta reading and critiquing and hassling my critique partner to finish her book (pleeeaaasseeeee). But except for what’s already completed, you won’t see more of my work on Amazon for a long time.
And please know that I’m more than grateful for all the support I’ve been given over the past year and a half. I hope everyone enjoys Unbroken Fire (coming this summer!) and can give me the time I need to back away and enjoy my own writing.